I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance.

Thank you my sweet baby boy for 11 years of love and fun and memories. You will always be my special boy, Ronin Jacob. Mama loves you and misses you soooo much! Kisses and hugs forever. Sleep well gray one. You have earned it. Thank you for choosing me. I will never forget that moment we met. I didn't know I wanted you (I wanted a female). But you knew you wanted me and pulled me to you and jumped into my arms and that was that. You were at that moment my love. It was my honor and joy to have known and loved you. Thank you for gracing my life with such joy and love and sharing yours with me. You were there for some of the toughest times I've ever known and never left my side through it all. Oh how I will miss your sweet love and cuddling. You've taken such a big part of us all with you but you have also left behind some of the sweetest memories we'll ever know. I promise that we will help each other through this, especially your brother Bear. So far he has just wandered around looking for you. He stares up the stairway thinking that's where you MUST be since he's checked everywhere else for you. Only he's not allowed upstairs, as you were not, so he just has to wonder when you are coming down. Oh if only that were so.
I have never been able to be away from you for very long, barely overnight, your whole life and now I must somehow carry on without you every day from now on. Please help me through this baby boy with your sweet memories and love.